Hot days, hot breeze...love it!! I've been swimming every day for the last week and up until today it's felt like a bit of a chore, but today....today I glided through the water like a little plastic windup scuba diver from an Almodovar film. It felt like I wasn't even moving..effortless.

Maybe it's because I'm drinking like a fish...water that is and eating more protein.

Three quarters of the way down the pool, on my first lap, a pair of sunglasses floated before me, and without breaking my stride, I swam deeper, picked them up on a stroke and put them on the side of the pool.

Was very smooth.

A nice change from this morning which was fraught with phone company bureaucracy and internet banking. Looks like I am getting closer to getting the blackberry that I won connected though, so at least there was some joy.

And the boy? You are no doubt wondering...well quite lovely thank you ;-) He is coming up the mountain to visit my world this weekend and meet a whole of host of old friends whom I don't see very often.

Although last night I dreamt that as I was driving to this party, I could see a huge fire like a twister. I thought that it would be OK cos one of the people at the party is fairly senior in National Parks, and he would have it under control. It was amazing and very scary.

Some days it feels like a bit of a war zone. Helicopters overhead, sirens in the distance, smoky air...really quite disorientating.

I just dropped Luka off at Pete's because I've got an early start tomorrow. 8am - 9pm in Sydney and I'm home and should be getting ready and sorting out some stuff from today, networking computers etc..but i don't wanna!!

So I am eating lime and pepper chips and drinking really nice champagne, and feel like getting trashed. I feel like taking multiple substances and dancing. Dancing to the rain Gods to extinguish the fires and bring relief to the dryness permeating my skin. And if it rained I would dance naked under the wet moon and howl! and roll around on the grass until I was covered in mud.

And I would, finally after many hours sleep not get up early, and not drive, and not sort out breakfast, and not pay bills, and work out why my blackberry isn't working, and not....just not.

I would eat things out of packets and dance around the house naked...

Damn this champagne is yummy!

Why do I feel like this?

I have started dating this lovely guy in Sydney who I met online and last weekend we slept together for the first time. It was our fourth or fifth date and it felt strange cos it was like the only thing that didn't match where we were at. We msn and talk and email and sms a lot, so feel like we know each other quite well, but had only kissed once before. Strange to be so intimate conversationally, but not physically. He's a nice man, and I feel like we are quite well matched. And when we started making out on Saturday night, it felt totally right. I told him, and it was the most eloquent I have ever felt.

It was nice to wait. For both of us, as it seems we both have a predeliction for jumping right in there with someone new without actually thinking about whether it's the right thing to do. And sure, some really fun times have come out of that, but ultimately either dissatisfaction or heartache.

With this one, it could really work I feel. But I feel a bit strange about it. Out of my comfort zone maybe. Or maybe it's just been a really wearying 12 months. I'm scared too. And really tired. And worried about the whole long distance thing. Sure it's only a couple of hours away, but far enough for it to be a weekend affair, rather than lunch and dinner catch ups, and two little kids involved.

I think I need a book. I wish I had a manual sometimes for how to 'do' my life. I wish I knew more. I do like this boy and I know he likes me. That's nice. Maybe that's all I need to know for now.

Is it possible that we are now post-geek in a post-modernist deconstructive kind of way? Is Geek passe? Is that like, so early 90's? Can I start organising a 'reclaim the Geek' march?

ATTENTION ALL GEEK KIDS!!

I need some help. I am writing a series of guided meditation CDs and need background music. The CDs are 30 mins long each and I need relaxing, easily accesible music that includes stuff like Tibetan singing bowls, crystal bells, water, etc.. This would be a 'signature' piece that runs through all the CDs. Any ideas on ways of sourcing such music? Ideally I would like to set up a barter type situation involving internet marketing knowledge. In fact any marketing knowledge that is required. Basically, the CDs will be available online and I could include a link to your site, on mine, and promote your music on my site. This site will have an enormous amount of traffic to it once it is set up (within the next month) Or otherwise free sources. Any ideas anyone?

Please forward to anyone who might be interested.
Thanks.

It's amazing what happens when you least expect it.

I have been working 12-14 hour days and loving it. Working with Lou is sheer joy and the way we think along the same lines is sometimes freaky. Yet in so many ways we are complete opposites. But our ideas are similar and the generosity of our spirits. Most importantly. Heading in the same direction.

And I met a man..kind of out of the blue. Jade chaperoned me on our first date for the first 5 minutes. Made sure he wasn't a serial killer. And that wasn't even a week ago and the verbal and written exchanges we have had have been nothing short of amazing. I am totally spun out. This morning he texted me a sonnet and it made me feel cherished. Appreciated. And we haven't even kissed. It's so sweet.

I think I am being courted, in that lovely old fashioned way. He is out of the state until the end of next week, so it will be a long week.

And this week, as most of you know, I took Jade to her first live concert. Hard to believe hey? And we had so much fun. We had the whole day in the big smoke, and hung out on the beach, ate good food, did a little bit of shopping and got lost. Did a lot of u-turns!!

But it was awesome. The people at the concert were great too. We had a little entourage by the end. Very funny. The funniest thing was when Jade let in all the short people in front of her. After a while, well for the headline act, we managed a little hip and shoulder jostle that got us closer to the front. Tough crowd though. Not enough love amongst these youngens today.

In my day, if you wanted to go to the front, you just did. Although, come to think of it, in those days I was probably one of the short people..

I'm not working tomorrow. Instead I am taking my girl to the local fair, where she is walking in the parade with her pre-school. I must sort out my camera.

Hope everyone is well.